wow my brother was telling me this joke and he said
"if you’re fighting with a woman and she pulls a knife on you, just pull out the bread and cheese and meat and her womanly instincts will kick in and she’ll just make you a sandwich"
then all of a sudden our mom emerges from the kitchen holding a huge ass knife and she approaches my brother asking “sorry what was that?” and he started screaming
Bless you for bringing your broom everywhere you Quidditch-obsessed nerd.
That moment in your childhood when you realize that Diagon Alley is just the word diagonally….
And the Mirror of Erised is just the word desire backwards.
Didn’t even realize. Does that mean Knockturn Alley is nocturnally (dark/night)?
Yes, and Grimmauld Place is a play on grim old place.
And Dumbledore is just a dumb old door
Yes, it does.
Guys get morning wood because our bladders fill up during the night and begin to press against our prostate, causing arousal. Our dicks don’t just feel the sun coming up and think “My time has come”
I want to go to this exact point and run around it saying “I’m in Sweden!” I’m in Finland!” “I’m in Norway!” until I get tired
i aspire to great things in life
According to Google Maps, that point is in the middle of a small lake.
So we’ll do it in January when it’s frozen.
actually that’s why they’ve helpfully dropped a big-ass cement block with a bridge surrounding it in the middle of the lake: for the express purpose of doing what OP aspires to do
The mummified heart is said to be that of vampire Auguste Delagrance, responsible for the deaths of more than forty people back in the 1900, a period of vampirism in the USA. When he was identified, Delagrance was hunted down by a Romano Catholic priest and a Voodoo Hougan, and was destroyed in 1912. (x)
This is fucking Rad
"I’m Fine" Biggest lie I have ever said